Happy Halloween! TGIF! What a double whammy!

I was mobbed today by kids looking for candy- it blows my mind what the chocolate does to students... good thing I only do this once a year! Check my photo page for shots of my pumpkin cookies (as I told the students: pumpkin shaped, pumpkin color, NOT pumpkin flavor) and the costumes the students came up with. The best one was actually Jaclyn, who dressed as a pirate, I didn't get a very good shot of her so I'll try again at her school's Halloween assembly in a couple weeks. I also was pretty darn cute as a Christmas tree, complete with a gold star on my head. Oops... didn't get a shot of that one either, shucks!

This week has been exhausting. I'm not sure what it is- probably a combination of the changing weather, excitement over Halloween, the shadow of a cold, and having two tests to be thinking of at once (driving & Japanese). I also started thinking more concretely about my upcoming vacation: we fly to Thailand on November 22nd and haven't yet chosen an itinerary. Tomorrow, Tom's flying back from business in Shanghai and we have vowed to decide whether to go trek up North in the hill tribe area (hiking, rafting, caves, elephant rides) or hang out on an island (beaches, kayaking, bungalows). We will be touring Bangkok (the capital) the day we arrive and our last day, and have also loosely committed to checking out the city of Ayutthaya, the old capital (full of ancient temples and Buddha scupltures). I spent some time with my guide book this week and I'm really excited. I was positively drooling over the food descriptions!! If any of you who've been there have any advice... I would definitely appreciate some!!!

I think another aspect of my exhaustion is the fact that my job is one where I am literally doing entertainment/public presentations every single day. I stand up in front of my kids and every class, the re-decide whether they think English (and I) am cool, interesting, confusing, moronic, etc... or not. Some times I dread heading to school because I would rather have a day back in cubicle land in Chicago where I could hide behind (granted short) walls and a phone and a computer screen and the only people I actually had to talk to were my peers who were generally also friends. It is so hard to keep up the "happy and engaged/ing teacher" act 8 hours a day, 5 hours a week. It makes me wonder about teaching back home, but I know that there will be so many differences that its hard to imagine. For instance, I will have my own classes that I will see more than once a week... and it will be my choice how to lead class. A huge factor, of course, will be the fact that at home everyone will be speaking in English... I won't have to worry that I'm not being understood. Here, I work so damn hard to be interesting because if they don't get it... the kids will turn off their attention in about ten seconds. I just wish I could hide some days!! And then I feel so guilty for feeling that way... I mean the point in me being here is to motivate these kids to want to learn English, explore other cultures.. how can I do that if I don't appear totally excited about the topic??

Just something I've been working through as of late... again, comments welcome. If I don't make sense... don't worry I'll try again another day. ;)

ok... I admit it!! I broke down and turned my heater on yesterday.... I am so weak. (Start Rant)

My goal was to make it to November without using any kerosene, but it didn't happen. For those of you who I haven't complained to about the "heating system" in Japan... Yeah.. there is none. Basically it is freezing everywhere, every day of winter. Japanese homes are built with thin walls (I propped my bike against an outside wall once and the flourescent light in my bathroom on the inside of the wall fell off and broke!) and no insulation. On top of that (and this is the real kicker), there is no central heating in homes or schools. What this means to those of you who will never have to experience it (you lucky, warm people!) is that through winter you feel like you are living in a tent. We have little tiny heaters that are about two feet off the ground, which we fill with kerosene. Then, when you enter the room (and its freezing), you push the button and wait for the kerosene to light. While you're waiting, you slowly turn blue. Finally, the kerosene lights and you plop down right in front of the heating vent. Soon... you either warm up or you pass out from the kerosene fumes. Of course, when you leave that room and go elsewhere, you must repeat the process. Unless, of course, you are going to the bathroom or the shower, where there is no heater (though the toilet seat is heated!) and you therefore just freeze. One of the "funnier" things about this system is that since we heat our rooms by burning kerosene, the heaters automatically turn off after 3 hours so that you don't die in your sleep from the fumes. When they turn off, you are technically supposed to open the windows. Does this sound like an unbelievably backward system to anyone else?? Rotary Exchange and Global both taught me not to judge the customs of another country... but why can't a country that has cell phone technology as an artform and a robot for an ambassador figure out an effective way to keep from freezing all winter? It's all very silly. The above goes for my day to day at school, only its worse there since our school resembles one in California, with open (to the outside) hallways and doors which are kept open through the coldest winter days.

The above was a rant... later when it is actually cold out, I will cut and paste it so I can get more sympathy. No, it isn't that cold yet, but the cold nights have brought back the memories of last year and as much as I am enjoying the changing season... I am dreading the days of 24 hour long underwear and the constant smell of burning kerosene!

(Rant Over) This week is flying! Since tomorrow is Halloween and a Friday and a English Drawing day... I am really busy. Tonight I am going to try making some orange pumpkin-shaped sugar cookies for the Lotto Drawing. Then I need to assemble my costume- I am going to be a Christmas Tree this year! I promise to take some pictures. I'll be attending the Halloween party after school at Jaclyn's school... hopefully they can figure out why I've wrapped myself and my green sweater in sparkly garland! I also need to run to the grocery store and stock up on candy. I have been promising classes that if they come "trick or treat" at my desk tomorrow in costume... they will get candy. I don't have a clear idea of how many students will actually attempt to find a costume. I'm guessing most of them will come in club uniforms or make a mask out of notebook paper. It should be really interesting.

This weekend is the Apple Marathon.. I really hope we have good weather! Last year, in the course of the race, it snowed, got sunny, got cloudy, was cold, was hot, and was really windy (when we were going uphill!). Since I'm only running half the distance I did last year, I will hopefully have fewer weather changes.

A little over 3 weeks until I leave for Thailand...!

Today was driving test day... and even though I have yet to meet a single person who has passed the test on their first shot... I felt really ready for it... and if I drove perfectly, shouldn't I pass? In Japan, the answer is a definite NO.

Yes, I failed. After another 15 minutes of hassle over whether I had or had not (I had) lived in America for three months since 1998 (my Global trip had him dizzy), he finally agreed to actually let me take the test... which was a victory in itself. I was massively relieved. There were three of us taking the test for the first time: a man from Brazil and a Japanese girl who had an American license from when she was a student in the States. We took the eye test and sat for the written test with no problems. Then the past failures... two Brazilians on their fourth and fifth tries (Brazilians and Americans are two of the only nationalities that are required to take the driving test... other people are allowed to just take the eye test) marched outside with us to the driving course. It is an obstacle course complete with traffic light, high visibility-blocking bushes, an obstacle in the road, and tight 90 degree angle side-walk width "streets". Scary stuff, I tell you.

I did my best, I really did. Besides hitting the gas at the start before putting the car into "Drive" (I was still in "Park"...but really, is there anything that wrong with that?!), I believe I really nailed it. After we'd all finished we were gathered up to the front where he ticked off all of our errors and told us we'd all have to come back again. This is when I really felt sorry for the two Brazilians who had failed for the fourth and fifth times because I realized that they are from a littlel town down south of here... by over two hours!!

All the guy could come up with for failing me was that if I'm in a straight-away.. I shouldn't remain in the same lane... I should switch lanes. I don't have the faintest idea why. He said the same thing to the Japanese girl; she didn't understand, either. He also told me that when I'm slowing down for a curve, I need to pump the breaks instead of breaking slowly and gradually, like I thought I should. What really sucks is that the first guy, who was the one coaching us on the course... gave us instructions to "follow Japanese laws"... and in everything else to just do as we were taught in our own countries. I did that... the only complaints were merely cosmetic, subjective opinions. I am very frustrated at the system, in which it appears that they only care about making as much money off defensless drivers as possible. Gah!!

My favorite part was afterwards, when the Japanese girl was talking with her mother (they gave me a ride to the station). Her mother asked her if the guy had treated her nicely because she was the only Japanese person. "No", she said, "Actually, it was rough because he was totally speaking down to us and teasing us because 'we' were gaijin/foreigners". I was relieved to hear my own sentiments weren't simply because I'm so bitter!

I get another shot at it after I get back from Thailand, in December. I'll have to go to driving school and hand over a hundred dollars before then, because I don't think they pass you until you do. Yippee!!

On a happier note, I don't have to go back there for over a month, and I'm headed to Tokyo tomorrow to get some Starbucks and go hiking up another mountain (not simultaneously).

Jaclyn got her license! They were still a pain about it because they couldn't actually give her the license yesterday since the computer was already turned off for the day. She had to take more time off of school to go back to get it this morning. But, now one of us is finally driving legally again!!! The bad news is that Danielle was having a perfect shot at it until she went to park the car... she bumped the curb with one of the front tires. That's all it took- she failed. The worst part is that she doesn't get another chance until December!! The really bad news is that that will also be MY next chance to give it a go. Augh!!! This is such a pain in the butt.

I'm having an "I don't really want to be here" week. Yesterday was a full day of midterms for the entire school (teachers excluded). I don't give tests, so on test days I have no class and no responsibilities... I don't even grade tests (for the most part... I help read some short answer responses sometimes). So yesterday I came to school armed with my Japanese text books and some things I needed to research on the net. Unfortunately I quickly discovered that the Internet was dead. Ugh. I studied as hard as I could but there are only 4 levels on this Japanese proficiency test and I am stuck between levels... I've passed 3 with flying colors and 2 is TOTALLY beyond me. I was soon cross-eyed from staring at kanji. I was actually attempting to study grammar, but since I couldn't even read the question... I didn't get very far. Definitely an additional stumbling block to studying Japanese instead of Spanish. I've been studying on and off for over ten years and I'm still functionally illiterate. It makes me want to cry.

And that all only got me through the first half of the day. I stared at the ceiling, I sent e-mails via my phone, I read all 3 newspapers from the weekend, and even tidied my desk. "I was bored to death", to quote one of my students from a recent journal entry. Anyway, Today is day 2 of no classes since the teachers are busy handing back tests and explaining the problems. And the internet was down again this morning!! I almost lost it. Back to studying. The worst part is that I've sworn I will never bring a book (i.e. fiction, for entertainment- not study purposes) to school because it is such bad form and want to at least look like I'm working... (ha!). But yesterday, as I walked down the hallway I saw several teachers sitting in a test-taking classroom- novel in hand. Argh.

I had an annual formal meeting with my school principal today. He meets with all of us this week to begin working out staffing decisions for next year. The school year ends in March and before then he needs to figure out who is staying, who is going, where they are going, and who will replace them. My interview was less serious than the others (I am imagining) because he has a lot less responsibility for me and for choosing a succesor if I leave. I am also on a different timeline, since my contract lasts until August. However, since he was already in the zone... he made me pretty much spell out my current feelings. Though I tried to convey my indecision split between a) going home b) going to Tokyo or c) staying... He just heard me say that I'm pretty much not staying... and plans to convey that to the Board of Education. Now, while that may be what happens (and is most likely), I just started this year... for crying out loud!! Now I'm feeling totally pressured about it. He was very cool with everything, but apparently doesn't appreciate gray areas very well. Oh well. I've gotten quite committed to the thought of finding work in Tokyo next year, so I'm not too worried.

While we were at it, I also asked him to approve my plans to head to Thailand in November (during the term final tests, another 4 days of doing nothing) and Christmas. He approved so I'm completely set!!

Finally, Jaclyn and Danielle are at this moment awaiting the results from their second attempts to get Japanese drivers licenses. I am watching my phone waiting for the word. They both went to driving school this weekend and hopefully gained enough advice to squeak through. I will be very relieved when at least one of us is driving legally again. I get my own first chance (again) to take the test on Thursday afternoon. I'm not very nervous because I have just about no chance of passing. It would be nice to actually officially fail this time though, so I can go take some lessons (official stamp of failure is required at the driving school for some insane reason...). Maybe by my third trip out there I will have jumped through enough hoops... but I was just chatting with another AET who didn't get her license until her 3rd test, which make it 4 trips for me. I hate this process. Update after the test!

you know, as much as I try to "not sweat the small stuff"... sometimes I swear the world is against me!!! I am so peeved right now I have been screaming and stomping around my house for 15 minutes!!!

Ok, I live in Japan and came here with what I thought I would need in a suitcase and a rather large camping backpack. I don't have a lot of clothing in the states, and much, much, much less here. I wear casual clothes to work which means I live in khakis. Since I'd really worn through my original work clothes I brought back 2 new pairs of pants when I went home this spring. One pair... since I am a short, average sized person instead of super-model perfect... had to be hemmed since they were about 6 inches too long. However, since I can't get anywhere near being able to wear Japanese clothing... they were my new treasure. In fact, the ones that required hemming weren't finished until just recently so they really are still brand spankin' new.

That leads me to my nightmare of the moment. I also just recently purchased a maroon Indian scarf. I should have known better, but after coming home after midnight last night I'm a bit drowsy and I tossed all my laundry in together (stop cringing!!). Yes, now not only are BOTH pairs of my brand new khakis splotched pink, but also a pair of jeans (which I tried but couldn't replace when I was home... to give you an idea of how important they are) and a brand new shirt (which is replacable and I bought it here, but stilll)!!! Gah. I won't mention the pink socks (oops.). Let me repeat: I am SO peeved!!!

So if my Japanese Stain-stick doesn't save my life, I guess I'll be hitting Gap.com tonight. And yes, before I get lectures, I DO realize that a)I should be separating my laundry (but if you didn't have a dryer you wouldn't wait that long for two full loads either) and b) that there are more important things to be peeved about.

but still!!!!!

I'm alive but having serious computer issues at work (where I write my blogger entries). Every time I write you all a nice story... it gets sucked into never-never land.

So... to say it really quickly before the story-deleting monsters arrive: we had a FABULOUS camping trip last weekend: saw the sunrise, saw a huge Mt. Fuji, and generally climbed our asses off. It was incredible. Pictures some day.

School festival was also fun, though really tiring coming right after the mountain climbing bit. I ran my leg in the relay and let's just say we didn't embarass ourselves, so it was good fun.

Spent this weekend (Monday was off) in Tokyo- headed out to Yokohama's China town (see the pictures) for some Chinese food, stocked up on instant oatmeal, peanut butter & granola bars at an int'l grocery store, and saw the Pink Ladies in concert (70's era J-pop duo that is huge at camp). Didn't get home last night until after midnight!!

I'm sleepy and will try to work out the computer bugs one of these days. Stick with me!!

Herby died! Wait, that's a bit too dramatic... more precisely he has had internal organ failure. He was throwing up all over the place. It was a traumatic afternoon.

Chill, all of you who don't know the inside jokes. Herby is my car (so named because when we were at the car sales store checking out cars he literally followed us around the parking lot, so we decided he is the Suzuki version of Herby the bug)... so although it was pretty traumatic when he stopped moving this afternoon (and forced me to walk the entire mile home from school), I don't think it was fatal and it was "just" a car.

The story: Jaclyn had the day off of school, so she gave Herb a looooong overdue bath and and an almost as overdue oil change (actually some guys at a car shop helped us out with that one, J didn't do it herself). When she went to go get me after school (crappy weather so I didn't bike this morning), he wouldn't budge. First, he was going forwards and not backwards (she needed to back out of our drive), but then he stopped moving forwards too. That was when she noticed he was leaking from below. Once I made it to our block I noticed splotches and splashes all the way down the street and followed them directly back to poor Herby. It wasn't water, but I wasn't entirely sure it was oil, either. However- it was TOO much of a coincidence that something was drastically wrong with our car the exact same afternoon it had been in for new oil. So I called the garage back and they promised to come immediately. I told them to just follow the trail....

Jaclyn and I made ourselves comfy in the back door/floor of Herb and waited, staring towards the street, for a tow truck and some apologies. After long enough to make me start doubting my directions... a tiny spearamint car swung around the corner and up our drive. Out jumped two identically jumpsuited "Auto-R" men with matching caps, tools in hand and serious looks on their faces. They saw the trail right away and followed it to Herby. After minimal introductions, they set to work. The leader soon enough popped the trunk and Jaclyn and I both heard a distinct "WA....?!" when he got his first look. Not a good sign at all... He signaled to us (I was a bit scared to look) and after peeking around the side of the car, we saw that the Herby's entire innards were shiney wet.... completely soaked. The guy ran his white gloved finger (yep... for a mechanic?? come on!!) along the top of the battery and showed us that his finger was pink. This is not oil, he asserted. Sure enough, he checked the oil and it was still full. Nope, this is probably due to a hole in the gear fluid hose.... which we had nothing to do with. "So this just happened to break the same day you worked on it???" I asked with a perfect (I must say myself) mix of sarcasm and respect. "Yes, that's right". Just to assure us that it was the gear fluid, he got into the car, turned it on (Jaclyn and I taking a few steps back after seeing the other garage guy do the same...) and pink/red juice came spurting out Herby's front end. It was a terrible sight!! Fortunately, he turned the car off quickly and showed us where the hole was. Since there was nothing I could do, I apologized for asking them to come out and sent them home. I still am not ready to believe they didn't somehow create that hole, but I wasn't going to pitch a fit. Its just too small a neighborhood and I depend on my neighbors too much for that.

So, then I called the store where we bought the car. They were incredibly apologetic, which always throws me off. Car sales men here seem to be of a completely different breed than those back home. From my experience (or perhaps from the movies, since the only real cars salesman I've ever known is my father... sorry Dad), selling and buying cars back home takes a lot of skill and is more a game... revealing and uncovering the least and the most information as possible depending on your position and your tactics. Here, we were told absolutly everything about the car right off the bat, including the fact that the last owner was a smoker and the roof fabric was therefore really bad (though we didn't notice it at all on our own). While we were in the process of purchasing the car, they drove all the way out to my school (from a different city) to have me sign paperwork, then when we actually bought it, they delivered it to my house and we handed money over in my kitchen (cash, too... that was quite something).

So back to today. After hanging up with a promise that they'd be out to check it out ASAP, they called back a second time and asked if we had another car. Uh.. no. Well, they didn't currently have a car to loan us.. would we be all right? Besides the fact that we didn't have a choice since it was painfully obvious Herby wasn't going to be particularly helpful until he got some serious medical attention... it was quite a treat that they were so considerate. I assured him that we both had bikes and we would be able to figure something out.

So he and another older gentleman (not in matching jumpsuits this time) pulled up in a large jeep with some chains after about twenty minutes. I told them the story and they agreed Herby would need to be taken to the garage. In order to get the car hooked up to their jeep though, they needed it pointed in the other direction. I was quite thankful that I own such a small car as I helped them push Herb back and forth until he was turned in the other direction. And off they went.... So now we are carless again. It was a rather exciting afternoon. I hope everything turns out all right, and I really hope it doesn't cost us a fortune. Its just a hose... right?

ps. shhh... don't say it too loudly but its actually supposed to be nice all weekend!!!

I'm having a very ho-hum week. The school festival is next Tuesday and Wednesday, so our classes have been shortened to 45 min. (from 50min- its amazing what a difference 5 minutes makes!!). Then, since we finish the academic day early, the kids have extra time for assembling all their assorted projects (the festival is less of a festival and more of a gigantic open house, science fair type thing... with no relation to science) and practice their homeroom songs and other presentations. Each class will perform one song during the music section, and there will be awards given for the top 3 classes (hence it will really stink to be the 4th of 4 first grade classes...). ANYway... my point is that since I am neither a student nor a "real" teacher... I have a ton of guilt-inducing time on my hands. I keep getting side-ways looks from the other teachers (who are crazy busy)... but I haven't the faintest idea what the heck I should be doing. So I'm just ignoring them (on the surface, anyway) and studying Japanese. I feel like a slacker though... a feeling that pretty much comes hand in hand with this job since I have almost none of the other responsibilities that other teachers have. I definitely enjoy being able to leave at four pm, but I doubt any of the other teachers understand that my position is totally different and that I am supposed to leave then. Add that to the huge guilt trips one is given for asking to take your vacation time or stay home when one is sick (things written into everyone's contracts)... and its perma-guilt for me. sigh.

The festival will be fun, so I am looking forward to that. Like last year, I will be running a leg of the female teachers' relay, during which we compete with all the club teams (tennis, basketball, art, science, judo, etc.). They will all be running in their sports uniforms, so its a pretty funny race (I am particularly impressed with the kendo-ists running with full armor and the judo-ists running barefoot!). The teachers also sing a song as part of the music competition (although we don't get any prizes... and shouldn't). Our song this year is so fast that I'm having trouble keeping up with the Japanese words. Finally, I've also been asked to turn something in that I've made, the PTA organizes a teacher/parent room with "things we've made" (I don't know how else to explain it). Last year I showed off a scarf I'd crocheted, but since Jaclyn's blanket is still only half-way finished, I begged my Shodo sensei to help me come up with something tonight. I had less than two hours to get all the kanji right, and only one chance to get it "perfect" on the final paper. It's not my best, but I think it meets minimum standards.

I'm tired. Friday I'm teaching 45 minutes of Intermediate Japanese to 8 other JETs at one of our annual meetings... and I've been really stressing about it. I've been asked to teach a hell of a lot more than I would cram into such a short, one-time workshop... so I'm overwhelmed. I'm also leading a discussion group on JHS lesson planning, but compared with teaching grammar... I'm not even thinking about that segment.

And when that's over... Tom and I will hold our breaths again and see what the weather looks like. If there are any signs of typhoons, thunder storms or even heavy cloud cover... I will go to Tokyo for the weekend. If, on Friday, at the last possible chance, they are still predicting sun... Tom will head this direction and we'll try to go hiking/camping in the mountains of Chino (Nagano). So watch your papers for news of some unprecedented weather swings in Asia this weekend... Mr. Weather is working something nasty up, I am sure.